Friday, April 26, 2002

America: Addicted to Irresponsibility

America: Addicted to Irresponsibility

Vicious Headbutt, the author of this right-on-the-money editorial, has a point!  My favorite paragraph:

I’m sick of all the excuses people have for being irresponsible and saying its not their fault when it really is.  Some of the most common defensive justifications for being a total fuck up are: “I can’t help myself,” and “It’s a sickness/disease,” and “Don’t blame the victim.” I wish there would be one honest “addict” that would just say, “Feel sorry for me because I’m a huge fuck up that will make up any excuse to deflect blame and not be held accountable for my own actions.”

Wouldn’t that be a breath of fresh air to those of us who would like to beat the living shit out of each and every loved one reveling in their perceived status as the victim of circumstance?  Shit, I have a REAL physical disease (not to mention a child with one, too), and if I worked hard enough at the bureaucratic, documentational hoop-jumping, I could probably spend the rest of my life living off the governmental teat.  But I’m NOT a victim, goddammit!  I’m a SURVIVOR.  And y’know why I’m a survivor?  Because instead of lying around wallowing in self-pity, I’ve always gotten off my fat ass and done what I had to do to keep a roof over my head, food in my belly and my bills paid. I don’t want or deserve any special recognition for that—it’s what you do when you become an adult, it’s not that fucking difficult.

You want your life to change?  Then quit whining, shut the fuck up and do what the rest of the world does: Work and take care of business instead of acting like the world’s got something against poor little you.  Boo fucking hoo.  The world doesn’t give a rat’s ass.  If you’re not an asset to your friends and family and the world at large, you’re a liability.  There’s no in-between.

We’ve all got some sad tale or another; we’ve all had our catastrophes in life.  Get over it and move on, because yours is no more important than the next guy’s.  In the end, no one really gives a shit what your problems are… it in no way affects your duty to do what needs to be done.

Sunday, April 07, 2002

Fuck Republicans

One of my colleagues, Greg Gregory wrote an article in this week’s AdultBuzz that makes some excellent points about the twisted desire of the current Powers That Be.  Read it here and be VERY afraid!

One article Greg links to is worth singling out here as well:  Al Martin’s “Imperial State Power in America” shows just one frightening example of how our government is leaning further and further toward fascism (now that doesn’t surprise me at all!).  If this article doesn’t send everyone running to the polls to vote Democrat (or any party other than Republican), I don’t know what it’ll take.  I’m well aware that there are all too many Americans who are satisfied, and even anxious, to give the government free rein over their lives… I pray (in my godless way) daily for the vaporization of the stupid, the sheeple of the USA.  Them, and their President!

Tuesday, April 02, 2002

The Law, Sir, is an ASS!

These little tidbits are proof:

A law in Fairbanks, Alaska, does not allow moose to have sex on city streets.

In Ventura County, California, cats and dogs are not allowed to have sex without a permit.

In Florida it is illegal for single, divorced, or widowed women to parachute on Sunday afternoons.

If a police officer in Coeur d’Alene, Idaho, suspects a couple is having sex inside a vehicle they must honk their horn three times, and wait two minutes before being allowed to approach the scene.

Women must address bachelors as master instead of mister, according to an Illinois state law.

A law in Oblong, Illinois makes it a crime to make love while fishing or hunting on your wedding day.

In Ames, Iowa a husband may not take more than three gulps of beer while lying in bed with his wife.

A law in Alexandria, Minnesota makes it illegal for a husband to make love to his wife if his breath smells like garlic, onions, or sardines. [Ok, maybe that’s a GOOD law!]

In Bozeman, Montana, you can’t perform any sexual acts in the front yard of any home, after sundown, and if you are nude.

A Helena, Montana law states that a woman cannot dance on a saloon table unless her clothing weighs more than three pounds, two ounces.

Hotel owners in Hastings, Nebraska are required by law to provide a clean, white cotton nightshirt to each guest. According to the law, no couple may have sex unless they are wearing the nightshirts.

Any couple making out inside a vehicle, and accidentally sounding the horn during their lustful act, may be taken to jail according to a Liberty Corner, New Jersey law.

During lunch breaks in Carlsbad, New Mexico, no couple should engage in a sexual act while parked in their vehicle, unless their car has curtains.

In Nevada sex without a condom is considered illegal.

In Cleveland, Ohio women are not allowed to wear patent-leather shoes. [Maybe that’s why DMoney picked California and a career in porn?]

Clinton, Oklahoma, has a law against masturbating while watching two people having sex in a car.

In Willowdale, Oregon, no man may curse while having sex with his wife.

In Harrisburg, Pennsylvania it is illegal to have sex with a truck driver inside a toll booth.

Hotels in Sioux Falls, South Dakota, are required by law to furnish their rooms with twin beds only. There should be a minimum of two feet between the beds, and it is illegal for a couple to make love on the floor between the beds.

In Kingsville, Texas, there is a law against two pigs having sex on the city’s airport property.

A Tremonton, Utah law states that no woman is allowed to have sex with a man while riding in an ambulance. In addition to normal charges, the woman’s name will be published in the local newspaper. The man does not receive any punishment.

No woman may go in public without wearing a corset in Norfolk, Virginia.

In the state of Washington there is a law against having sex with a virgin under any circumstances (including the wedding night). [Um… how the hell would one get around THAT?]

The only acceptable sexual position in Washington D.C. is the missionary-style position. Any other sexual position is considered illegal. [I wonder if Bill & Monica knew?]

* Credit where it’s due: Posted by a gal on one of the email lists I subscribe to. *